The Capitol janitorial service made the executive decision to deep clean the Congressional hearing rooms today with military-grade flamethrowers.
Published: Friday, March 1st, 2024 @ 11:23 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Witnesses claim the inaugural MMA training session for Twitter CEO Elon Musk began in confusion as UFC fighter Georges St-Pierre calmly explained to the world's richest man that no, mind-control flamethrower drones were not allowed in competitions.
Published: Wednesday, August 16th, 2023 @ 10:11 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Portland, Oregon’s police force has been anemic since the 2020 racial unrest that led to riots, which partly explains why hoodlums are now running amok — even deploying a flamethrower — as they takeover entire streets in The City of Roses.
Published: Saturday, September 10th, 2022 @ 8:26 am
By: Daily Wire
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