McConnell Dresses As Prostitute To Lure Hunter Into Closed-Door Hearing | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on Eastern NC NOW with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    WASHINGTON, D.C.     With Hunter Biden refusing to appear for closed-door testimony to the House of Representatives, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell cleverly dressed up like a prostitute to lure Hunter in to meet with Republicans.

    "Hey, big boy," said Senator McConnell in his most sultry voice, as Hunter strolled by. "I've been so lonely, hoping a fifty-something addict would come by and split this bag of crack cocaine with me. What do you say, stud?"

    Though some insiders were skeptical that the ploy would be successful, Republican leadership remained confident. "McConnell may not be much to look at under normal circumstances," admitted Representative Dan Crenshaw. "However, those of us who have seen him dress in drag for private congressional parties can attest to the fact that he can certainly catch your eye in the right dress. If he has Lindsey Graham to help him with hair and makeup - watch out!"

    While Hunter Biden initially refused to comply with a congressional subpoena to testify, McConnell and other GOP lawmakers believed it was only a matter of time before he would be caught in their trap. "Just look at McConnell in that outfit," said Senator Tom Cotton. "Who can resist that?"

    At publishing time, McConnell was overheard asking aides to thank former New York Congressman George Santos for letting McConnell borrow his dress.

poll#180

Now that the public is allowed to know the truth regarding the Hunter Biden Laptop Scandal, after more that 2 1/2 years of deception by the corrupt Corporate Media Kabal, propropagandidats all, and the discredited Deep State, we have NOW learned that the infamous laptop is far less about the Biden Boy's fetish for pornography, narcotics and Russian whores, and far more about Hunter's pivotal role in the Biden Crime Syndicate's selling of deep access to our foreign adversaries, and to what extent it has compromised our national security: What is your opinion about this possible coordinated Treason?

  It is imperative that we know the truth of what may be the greatest scandal in our Republic's history, and all aforementioned parties prosecuted for their crimes against the People.

  Currently, our Two Tiered Justice System is constructed to protect all Democratic Socialists, their corrupt "Journalist" spokes-sheople, and their Deep State enablers ... so why bother.

  It is Donald Trump's fault.

  How can we be assured that the "Laptop" is real? Would NOT our standard journalists have investigated this issue thoroughly nearly 3 years ago if it was real?

535 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?

poll#204

After nearly 8 months of the United States House of Representatives' Oversight Committee hearings, House Speaker Mike Johnson is pursuing an Impeachment Inquiry into the strong allegations of Bribery, Influence Peddling, Money laundering and possible Treason regarding the Biden Family Shell Corporations' business dealings with foreign nations that are adversarial to our survival: Is it prudent and wise for the Republican controlled U.S. House to investigate this Democratic Socialist President?

  No, Democratics should never be investigated because they are so superior to their Republican counterparts, and care so much more.

  Yes, in a Constitutional Republic, bound by the Rule of Law, no one is above the law, and that law must be applied evenly.

  Not sure ... Now, what got all this started?

296 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?