Doctor Says His Decision To Cancel All Gender Transition Surgeries Has Nothing To Do With Massive Pile Of Lawsuits Stacked Behind Him | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    BOSTON, MA     The office of Doctor Rodney Thorne has had a busy week telling patients he is no longer providing gender-affirming care to minors, while also emphasizing that the decision to cancel all gender transition surgeries has nothing to do with the massive pile of lawsuits stacked against the wall behind his office.

    "Oh, those towering piles of legal complaints? They're, umm, totally unrelated to my former practice of cutting the genitals off minor children," said Dr. Thorne to reporters as a receptionist walked in and added a dozen more lawsuits to the piles teetering precariously behind him. "I'm transitioning my practice to focus on, err, spleens. Yes, I've always had a love for spleen surgeries."

    Dr. Thorne explained how changing his surgical practice may leave a dent in his finances, and added that he may have to sell one of the yachts. His lawyer then leaned over and whispered in the doctor's ear.

    "Well, I guess I won't be selling any yachts, as my assets are frozen, which has nothing to do with these lawsuits, which aren't even about gender transition surgeries to minors, they're lawsuits about dangerous microaggressions that I aggressed, and some of those papers are thank you letters from very happy patients that totally don't want to kill me and also I'm retiring tomorrow, I mean today."

    At publishing time, Dr. Thorne's office had been boarded up and he had been seen trying to board a plane to Belize before a mob of kids whose lives had been destroyed by lucrative transition surgeries could catch him and tear off his limbs.

poll#164

It has been far too many years since the Woke theology interlaced its canons within the fabric of the Indoctrination Realm, so it is nigh time to ask: Does this Representative Republic continue, as a functioning society of a self-governed people, by contending with the unusual, self absorbed dictates of the Woke, and their vast array of Victimhood scenarios?

  Yes, the Religion of Woke must continue; there are so many groups of underprivileged, underserved, a direct result of unrelenting Inequity; they deserve everything.

  No; the Woke fools must be toppled from their self-anointed pedestal; a functioning society of a good Constitutional people cannot withstand this level of "existential" favoritism as it exists now.

  I just observe; with this thoughtful observation: What will happen "when the Vikings are breeching our walls;" how do the Woke react?

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