Biden Calls Dave Ramsey's Radio Show For Advice On Paying Off $31 Trillion | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    NASHVILLE, TN     This week, U.S. President Joe Biden called into the radio show of personal finance guru Dave Ramsey, asking for financial advice for paying off his $31 trillion debt.

    "You spent WHAT??? You need a BUDGET, buster - you've been spending money you don't have, and you're BROKE!" Ramsey roared into his headset and upset his paperwork on the table, hurling his pen across the room after the caller admitted that the total debt amounted to $31 trillion. "$31 trillion dollars? With a "T"? You'd better get ready for beans and rice, rice and beans while you're working through the 7 Ramsey Solutions baby steps to get out of this big STUPID mess you've made!"

    At first, the call had proceeded according to Ramsey's normal rhythm of uncovering, asking probing questions, followed by targeted recommendations for reaching financial freedom. Things derailed, however, when the caller elaborated on what had initially been positioned as a "small deficit," owning up to spending $6 trillion per year while making only $4 trillion per year, causing Ramsey to explode. "You spent two TRILLION more than you make? You got a freaking credit card from CHINA? WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!"

    The caller had tried to interject excuses, blaming "MAGA Republicans" and "deer wearing kevlar vests" and "corn pop," but Ramsey was having none of it. He bellowed into his headset "You need to buy a lot of envelopes for these trillions because you've been living dumb. D-U-M-B DUMB!"

    Ramsey had softened as the caller began whimpering, and switched tactics, painting the idyllic picture of how good it would feel to "tell the money where to go instead of wondering where it went." He encouraged the caller that getting on a budget would "feel like getting a raise," which seemed to comfort the caller, who began to gently purr, snore, and sniff.

    According to sources, the caller has since been enrolled in Financial Peace University, sent a copy of "Total Money Makeover," and been gifted a premium subscription to the EveryDollar app for aides to drag and drop every transaction of the $31 trillion debt, in keeping with the budget set up by the personalized plan from a Ramsey Solutions coach.

    At publishing time, the national debt had climbed to $58 trillion.

poll#132

Considering that Joe Biden is considered by so many to be the Imposter President: Is he actually knowledgeable enough, wise enough, patriotic enough to be this Constitutional Republic's president at this difficult point in these tumultuous times?

  Yes, Mr. Biden is thoughtful and kind, and just so different from the "Orange Man".

  No, this representation of "president" is either too corrupt, too stupid, or both to be a real president.

  I just want the fun guy, who knew how to make stuff work back.

670 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?

poll#162

In what may be the most divisive period in modern American History, even more divisive than the turbulent sixties due to today's lack of patriotism, consider what are the major catalysts causing so much of this calamity of conflict, and vote: What most instigates the division of America, on this day September 20, 2022?

  Racism within our society

  Sex realignment to the detriment of our society.

  Biden /Harris Wide Open Southern Border Policy for the Demographic Upheaval of OUR Constitutional Republic

  Rampant Crime in Democratic controlled cities, and the possible contagion elsewhere

  Covid Pandemic, and its mishandling at the political, and bureaucratic levels.

  The unresolved questions /allegation regarding the flawed 2020 General Election

  January 6th Riot or "Armed Insurrection", depending upon patriotic perspective

  Joe Biden as Divisive Leader; Ineffective and Corrupt Executive

  Failed Education Industry, from an overall perspective, regarding all levels of education.

  Propagandistic Media in complete conflict with the First Amendment's guarantee of Freedom of Speech, and the awesome responsibility of a Free Press..

  "Orangeman Bad!"

  Bureaucracy rushing to a behemoth size, its unjustified expense, and far too often overreach.

  The Weaponized Deep State for political purposes

  A secular ambivalence to all that is real.

  Record number of overdose deaths from opioids and now Fentanyl

  Biden Administration's disastrous Foreign Policy

  Bidenflation /supply chain failure inevitably evolving into stagflation and recession.

  "Ultra MAGA Extremists" freely speaking louder AND LOUDER!

927 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?