We Can Guess What Denomination You Are By How You Pray | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    Depending on who you ask there are many ways to say grace before a meal. You show us how you pray when gathered with others and we'll tell you what that says about your theology.

    So listen carefully next time during grace and that'll be a dead giveaway as to what that person believes.

    The prayer is for massively unhealthy fried chicken and casseroles to nurture our bodies - Baptist

    Every other word is "thou", "thy", or "yeoldethinesteth" - KJV Baptist

    Prayer is led by a woman - Hey, wait a minute, you're not a Christian!

    Prayer is about how terrible, awful, and undeserving we all are of the food we're about to eat - Calvinist

    No prayer - Unitarian

    Makes strange hand gestures, might be praying or summoning an eldritch Lovecraftian horror - Catholic

    Starts with Daddy God - Episcopalian

    Start with Mother God - Episcopalian

    Recites ancient prayer claimed to have been the exact words the Apostle Peter prayed over his fish tacos - Eastern Orthodox

    Makes everyone hold hands - Your mom. DAAAAAANG!

    Says cute little liturgical prayer between gulps of beer - Lutheran

    By thanking the moon and sun god for this bountiful harvest - Wait a second! You're a pagan!

    Pray incantations in Latin - Catholics again

    Pray incantations in Pig Latin - Joe Biden

    Only Dad prays in this house - Presbyterian

    Peek through your eyelids during prayer to see if the tide is back in and the surf is lookin' gnarly - Calvary Chapel

    Silent prayer over delicious oatmeal - Quaker

    Prays in Hebrew and glances around to see if everyone noticed - Seminary student

    No prayer just rolling around on the floor saying gibberish - Pentecostal

    Well there you have it folks! That's the definitive list of all the different ways to say grace.